SCHOOL IS ALMOST OVER :(

You would think I would be happy that the school year is coming to an end, but I am not! Don't get me wrong I am looking forward to lazy summer days with the kids! But, at the moment all I am able to dwell on is the kids getting older. I already miss my babies! Blake will be in first grade, and somehow that moves him out of the newborn/innocent/awe and wonder stage of kindergarten! Katie will be moving up to fourth grade, and will be an "upper" grader! I look at them and want time to stand still. We thought we would so happy when they were a little older and self sufficient, and felt as though the day would never come, now it's here and I wish it weren't! I know alot of it is knowing Blake is my last. I wonder what kind of job I have done, have I layed a good foundation? When I think and ponder, I see and feel all the many things I wanted to do and be and haven't been! I wish I could call out "DO OVER PLEASE", but of course I can't. I try to look forward and move on from here but I am stuck with "should of, could of, would of". Perhaps part of it may be my age too, let's face it I am ancient :) To be honest though turning 40 has been a HUGE deal for me. My point in writing this wasn't for sympathy or people telling me your a great mom Donna. Because it is what it is.... On a lighter note sorry I haven't written in so long, it just seems all I really have to say is depressing and better left unsaid. I have enjoyed everyone's posts and I have read them all whether I comment or not, guess I am just too lazy sometimes. That's it for now, Love to All Donna
PS Yes, I know there is still a billion memories to make as the kids grow, it's just so hard at the moment.